The Beginning

Every story has a beginning. I can pinpoint when I really started to get big. It was about 10 years ago right before I got married when I broke my foot in 7 places. I was already plus size, but I could diet and exercise and lose 15 lbs and be ok. When I broke my foot, I ended up in a wheelchair for a very long time. Then I got sick and had several surgeries. When I finally started to recover – a year and a half later – I was in a car accident and hurt my back and my knee. More surgery. By then I had gained 30 lbs and my marriage was on the rocks. I didn't need to look good for anyone anymore, and I didn't feel good enough to look good for myself. So the weight gain continued.

I went from 165 to 195 pounds. When my marriage ended, I decided to focus on ME – and I dropped 15 pounds, but then I met my boyfriend and father of my 2 children, and the weight started to creep back on. Fast forward a few years and I had my first baby. I gained 55 lbs with her. Considering I was already overweight to begin with that was A LOT. I had ballooned up to 240 pounds. I dabbled in losing the weight and bounced back and forth for the next two years, but eventually I got down to 215. I was so close to being back under 200!!! Until I got pregnant again.

My second daughter brought me up to over 250 lbs. The highest I had ever been in my life. My self-esteem plummeted and now, 9 months later, I am still at 250 lbs. But its time to change.

I've spent the past 10 years of my life focusing on something or someone else, and I know that to get my life back, my shape back, I have to bring the focus back to me. Maybe that's selfish? But as I near my 30^th birthday, I realize that I want to be around for the next 30, and maybe even the 30 after that. So I will refocus and start slow. I don't expect to lose 100 lbs over night, though that is my ultimate goal. I haven't been 150 lbs since middle school, but I know I will get there again. Baby steps.....

I look forward to having any of you that care to follow me on this journey around – to ask questions or inspire me with your own stories, but overall, this is MY story.